Patient Parenting

Building Blocks Therapy Centre’s

Patient Parenting Tips

Stress

By Jevetta Doyley

Patience

ˈpeɪʃ(ə)ns/

Noun

The ability to wait, or to continue doing something despite difficulties, or to suffer without complaining or becoming annoyed:  You have to have such a lot of patience when you’re dealing with kids.  In the end I lost my patience and shouted at her.  He’s a good teacher, but he doesn’t have much patience with the slower pupils.  Making small-scale models takes/requires a great deal of patience.  Their youngest son was beginning to try my patience (= annoy me).  Patience – they’ll be here soon!

Opposite:  Impatience

 

Impatience

ɪmˈpeɪʃns/

Noun

Easily annoyed by someone’s mistakes or because you have to wait: He’s a good teacher, but inclined to be a bit impatient with slow learners.  You’d be hopeless taking care of children – you’re far too impatient!

Wanting something to happen as soon as possible: He’s got a lot of exciting ideas and he’s impatient to get started.  People are increasingly impatient for change in this country.

Opposite: Patience

Source: Cambridge Dictionary

There are many things that can make our patience wear thin, or lead us to become impatient.  When you are parents and caregivers, this may seem to double, as you battle for and sometimes even against the kids as they learn to become more independent and push to gain their own way in the big wide world.  We’ve got some tips that may help you at home or school.

 

Be Mindful

Patience is deep-rooted in our own expectations and beliefs about the things that go on in our lives.  Think about it, we expect certain things to happen at a certain time or date.  We have deadline, that we are expected to meet or expect others to meet.  Our staunch beliefs in these often arbitrary things can lead us to become impatient when are expectations are not fulfilled.  

 

Identify what affects your ability to remain patient, address how you feel and why you feel that way.  What do you say when you lose your patience and how do others react to it?  Simply taking a step back and addressing it objectively may give you new insight into why you feel the way you do, how others may feel about your actions and reaction to what they have done.  

 

Often in heightened situations we find it difficult to see things from the perspective of others.   When the feelings of losing patience with a child develop, try to think rationally about it.  What is causing the child to act this way?  Is my own behaviour affecting the child?  How am I reacting, is this affecting the child’s behaviour?

 

Be Reflective

There are a number of ways you can do this.  Often when we lose patience or feel like we have handled situations poorly, we can be quite hard on ourselves and forget that we are allowed to make mistakes.   It’s important that we reflect upon what was discussed above and work on it, finding better ways of handling challenging situations that cause us to lose patience and develop new ways to communicate our wants and needs with others.  

 

How Can We Look After Ourselves?

Simply doing what we enjoy makes us feel happy.  Take time out for you, and you alone.  Plan the “me-time” so that it is something that you can look forward to.  After the child has calmed down try to engage in an activity together that you both can enjoy.  This can remedy any feelings of upset between you and the child.